Internet supported a Japanese bride who shared in a message viral now that she did not wear a wedding dress “western”, despite the wishes of her stepmother future.
Posted Thursday on Reddit’s “Am I the Asshole” (AITA) forum under the username u/PuzzledSurround6810, the bride explained that she wants to wear a Shiromuku, a traditional all-white wedding kimono. Her mother-in-law, however, claimed the attire would not “fit” the wedding’s “theme”.
The post garnered over 15,000 upvotes and nearly 3,000 comments from Redditors who agreed that the bride should wear whatever she wants on her wedding day.
“I’m ready to marry my fiancé in the fall of next year,” the bride wrote. “My fiancé and his family are Catholic and very religious. Due to this, I have accepted a church wedding, despite this not my faith, but the one sticking the point for me is what I will wear. »
The bride said she wants to wear a shiromuku for the ceremony and an overcoat for the Iro-uchikake-colored reception. But her mother-in-law wants her to wear a “Western” dress.
“My future MIL is uncomfortable with this and told me that if I want to wear a veil and robe that I should go to the Western style as it will be part of the wedding theme better and does not stick too much,” the bride said, adding that her mother-in-law even offered to buy the western dress.
“I know she probably doesn’t understand why I’m so upset about this, [and] I want to respect their traditions but I don’t feel like I’m respected in turn,” the bride concluded. “AITA?
Talk to Martha Stewart WeddingsPsychologist and author Dr. Paulette Sherman has advised brides to set boundaries with overbearing mothers-in-law during the wedding planning process.
“You can be nice and polite while doing things differently, and you can appreciate his advice but make other choices,” Sherman said. “Practice saying no in a pleasant way and also learn to politely set boundaries on who handles what.”
Sherman also encouraged brides to hire a wedding planner, who can act as a “buffer” between them and their future mother-in-law.
“Get help from a third party and let them make the big decisions while consulting with you,” Sherman advised. “Just let her know your mother-in-law has different tastes and let her deal with it.”
Redditors, in accordance with Sherman’s advice, told u/PuzzledSurround6810 to put his foot down with his mother-in-law and wear his shiromuku.
“NTA [not the a**hole]. You have already agreed to organize the wedding in a Catholic setting. Why wouldn’t they want to see your beautiful traditional dress? This day should be about you two together, merging equally,” u/3233fggtb wrote.
“NTA. It’s your wedding day and your culture is a big part of that time. You should wear what is most meaningful to you, [not] which is “acceptable”, especially since you have already compromised,” u/serieann24 said.
Redditor u/Leedsgoat added, “It’s YOUR wedding, not MIL’s. If she doesn’t like it then she doesn’t have to come!”
Newsweek contacted u/PuzzledSurround6810 for comment.
In other viral wedding news, the internet defended a man earlier this month who wanted to include his sister in the nuptials, despite not getting along with her fiancé. The internet also supported a woman who bought a wedding dress for a stranger but refused to pay for her daughter’s dress.
And last week, the internet sided with a woman who ditched her step-son from his father in a “childless” marriage because she needed to work.